Who am I?

Well, I think most of us first think of our own name when someone asks us who we are, but obviously our name is simply a sound with symbols attached to it. Who we really are is a much more complicated question.

In a course I am taking for my graduate degree at University of Redlands entitled "The Reflective Educator" we have been asking some of the "heavy" questions such as "What is learning?" and "What is reality?" In a conversation I recently had with the professor, he revealed some of the methods and theories he is currently using and writing about in regards to identity and I thought they were quite compelling. I will share the main idea below.

First of all, I personally believe that if we seek to understand who we are in the context of a spiritual reality, we very quickly come to a distinct understanding of who we are (the idea is that we have an inner "core" or spirit that is the "true" us), but for the purposes of this post I'd like to think about it in terms of who we are in the practical, every day sense. "Who am I at this point in my life and who do I want to become?" might be the question we're trying to answer within the framework I am about to share. With that said, if we think of ourselves like Shrek does, like an onion, we begin to realize that one of the primary ways we can find out how others view us is by first of all looking at our immediate, external being: our bodies and clothing. "Do I excercise? How much do I care about my looks? What kind of clothing do I wear? Do I dress for comfort? To impress?" Perhaps it depends on the day or the setting. "How do I comb my hair? Do I worry about styles?" These questions are all revelant to who were are.

The next level is the people with whom we choose to spend time. "Who is my closest companion? If you're married: "How do I treat my spouse?" If you have children: "How do I interact with my children?" Next level would be friends and acquaintances: "Who do I spend time with when I can choose my companions? What are my closest friends like? Do I spend time with people to help them? For my own pleasure?"

Finally you get to the most external levels: "How do I view my job? The people with whom I work? My neighbors? My fellow citizens? People of different races? People from other countries and/or religions?"

It's not my intention to provide answers to these questions or solicit responses, but simply to share this way of looking at one's self in order to become more reflective. I think sometimes we rely WAY to much on assumptions, even assumptions we have about ourselves. We must challenge who we assume we are so we can become better people. I assume I am a good father, but if I don't challenge this assumption perhaps I won't progress and become a better dad for my child.

I want to end this post with two quotes, one that is dead serious, related to the subject matter above, and the second one...well, you'll see:
"Begin challenging your own assumptions. Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in awhile, or the light won't come in."
Alan Alda

and

"I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran up and lit the evil puppet villain on fire. No, I didn't. Just kidding. I just said that to help illustrate one of the human emotions, which is freaking out. Another emotion is greed, as when you steal from a bank because you don't want to work, or something like that. Another emotion is generosity, as when you pay someone double what he paid for his stupid puppet."
Jack Handy